When it comes to in-law jokes, there is no shortage. People roll their eyes and say “My in-laws….” And the audience is primed to snicker. But every so often, you find someone who really seems to be blood rather than just a person married to a family member– and then all the jokes fall flat.

In my case, that would be my sister’s husband.

I met Dick when I was 15, and he started dating my sister. She was just out of high school and very starry eyed about this tall handsome military guy. For days on end she played “Soldier Boy,” until I wanted to run screaming from the house.

At first I was a little jealous of their relationship because I hadn’t found my Mr. Wonderful and would not for many years. But as the years passed, I realized that I had not just acquired an in-law.

I had found the brother I never had.

He took me to my driving test when my father couldn’t, and watched in horror as I knocked down the stop sign. He had the grace not to laugh out loud.

Years later, after my father had died, my newfound brother stood in for him on my wedding day, escorting me down the aisle.

We’ve been through rough times together. His kids’ teen-age years were trying, to put it mildly, and on my visits to Oklahoma City, I did the best I could to spread the family Gospel: Respect your parents. Follow your father’s rules. And the biggest one of all:

Some day you’ll have kids too, and then you’ll know why your father is acting this way.

Now my brother-in-law is grappling with cancer. In just a few days time, he went from having a pain in his side to discovering that he has lung cancer, and then finding out it had spread.

I know he is a Catholic, but I don’t know if he goes to church or not – and that’s between him and God. I do know that he has met some wonderful priests when he’s been hospitalized, and they have been Christ for him during those tough times.

He is facing this latest pothole in life with strength and courage. He wants to continue working at a job that he loves. He wants to continue enjoying his family and walking his dog, Reggie.

Just before this happened, I sent him a note, telling him I loved him. And letting him know how I really feel about him.

But there are some things hard to put in a note.

I want him to know that he is in my heart each moment of the day. That I pray for him constantly. And that I am asking readers of this blog to pray for him too. I won’t divulge his name for reasons of privacy, but just tell the Lord he is Lorraine’s big brother. He’ll know exactly who you are referring to.