I have a confession to make: I don’t like Flannery O’Conner. I know that sounds sacrilegious, even downright blasphemous, to those who dwell in Literaryland, especially if the dwellers are Catholics.

In school, I was forced to read “Wise Blood” and “A Good Man is Hard to Find” and a few others I don’t remember now. I do remember everybody going ooooh and aaaah, and all that, while I sat there wondering, What the hell is this? I wasn’t Christian at the time and maybe that had something to do with it, but it shouldn’t have. One shouldn’t like a writer merely because one shares the writer’s faith, obviously. After school, I never read O’Conner again.

For me, O’Conner is Depressing (capitalized for emphasis), given to pointless shock and to what I call “gut-wonder.” But it’s never been really required of me to explain why I don’t like her—I just don’t. I’ve said things like, It’s just a matter of taste, I guess, or, We have nothing in common, maybe. I’m a woman, childless and single, Georgian, Catholic, and a writer (well, sorta, anyway). But there it ends. Flannery and I just never had anything to say to each other.

Until recently. Flannery-fans will disapprove of this, maybe even disbelieve it, but having avoided all things O’Conner, I’d never come across the remark she made somewhere regarding the Eucharist: “Well, if it’s just a symbol, then to hell with it.”

What is the Eucharist? Everything. It’s the complete Gospel. It’s the culmination of Jewish history and the sum of the Christian faith. It’s the entire Catechism of the Catholic Church. It speaks not a word because it is the Word. It’s everything that ever mattered or ever will matter. It’s what you believe or don’t believe—and yes, that’s a decision you make, not an intellectual argument, and not a coercive sentiment—none of that stuff. A decision. Stark—and simple.

If you decide that it is, that decision will determine literally everything else. There is no place for all the chatter about liturgy, about finer points of theology, about any of that. There is only one thing to do: take off your shoes for you’re on holy ground, spend your life in worship and awe of this inexplicable wondrous thing, live every moment in gratitude—I could go on.

But if it’s a symbol, then to hell with it. We are soulmates now, Flannery and me.